How to be Happy: Be Grateful – I was 70 million dollars and I was depressed because I wanted to have 100, “a friend told me a few years ago when we had eaten after a conference in New York.
He had literally collected tens of millions of dollars, but he thought it was not worth it, but he needed at least a hundred million dollars.
His desperation, anxiety, stress, and the constant question of who he was, what he had accomplished, and his worth as a person led to depression and bankruptcy.
“I ended up with $ 432 in my bank account,” he told me.
“I remember going to the ATM, checking my balance and saying, what did I do?” – he told me.
After a few years, of course, he managed to reconquer his fortune and even to double it.
But this time, he did things differently, completely differently. And part of the change is what I want to share with you today.
How to be happy: to be grateful
When I tell this story, most people are surprised and think:
“How crazy, with 70 million dollars, I would be happy”
And then I ask them:
Do they make more money today than yesterday?
And when I’m at the conference, I say:
Raise your hand, which now earns double what it earned two years ago.
The 90% present in the room raise their hands.
And then I ask them:
And are you happier today? Less stressed? Do you feel freer? Less frustrated?
The answer usually removes the smile from everyone present, including me and my team:
“In” Your life today is better than yesterday and yet …
You see, most of our lives today are infinitely better than yesterday and yet we feel the same or worse than before.
Stress continues, fear is maintained, runners are there and frustration and worry are a daily ingredient in our lives.
And even if you think that you are not doing better financially (I doubt it), think about improving the relationship with your partner, the relationship with your family.
Or think about the skills you have developed, the experiences you have gained, the challenges you have overcome.
Your life is not perfect, I know. And if it serves you, it will never be.
But your life is beautiful:
You have friends with whom you enjoy your weekend, you have people who love you, you have a bed where you sleep, you have breakfast today, you have lunch and dinner today.
You need shelter from the cold, you have an Internet connection (60% of the population does not have), you have eyes to see, to appreciate what surrounds you.
You are able to dream, you have the opportunity to improve yourself, you have freedom, opportunities and, finally, you have life: you live.
This is what is missing
What is missing to be happy – really happy? … cultivate gratitude.
That you stop at least a second a day to think about what you have in your life today, to thank him.
Recognize what you have accomplished, the challenges you have overcome, the people you have met, the progress you have made.
Think about the experiences you’ve had, the magical moments you’ve experienced that make life worth living.
“And we live as if we would never die,” said the Dalai Lama.
I do not know if it will be absolutely true, but something is absolutely true:
We must begin by cultivating gratitude in our lives.
Do you know why?
Because you are grateful:
This is the only way to feel really happy.
It’s the only way to smile when you need it most.
It gives you the energy to go further in your life and the wisdom to recognize that progress.
This eliminates any frustration and gives you the clarity needed to overcome it.
Feeling grateful is everything you need in life.
No matter how much money you make, your weight, your appearance, the position you keep, the car you drive, the house where you live, the woman or man you marry can feel grateful that you will not be happy
… because as long as you can not thank for what you have today, you can not appreciate what you will receive in the future.
Know the latest failures
And that, dear friend, is the last failure: to succeed, but not to be happy.
I do not want that to happen to you, neither today nor never … that’s why I want you to cultivate gratitude.
This is the gift that I want you to learn to make every day
No matter what situation (good or bad) you are in if you can identify that little detail you feel very grateful for, then you have won the game of life.
The years for him to play for them n, fortunately, lived up to 110 years for one reason only.
The reason she personally shared in a 103-year interview for a documentary entitled “A Centennial of Wisdom”
“My mother taught me to be grateful for everything, I live happy, without resentment, because every day I think about what I’m grateful for.”
The question is how can we be grateful?
Contrary to what many people think, it’s not easy, it takes time and effort, a lot of effort.
I remember posting on Facebook a message about the importance of thanking a friend who wrote to me:
“Nelson, I can not be grateful, I do not understand how to do it, I do not know how to be grateful.”
I explained that I was not the only one, that gratitude is cultivated. What is a muscle like any other?
And then explain how you can cultivate it …
… introduces “The first question of the day”
The first question of the day is the easiest and most effective way to cultivate gratitude in your life.
This technique means that you are asked to ask the following question (before doing anything else):
No matter what day or place or time you wake up, all you have to do is ask this question and think about the answer.
Chances are you do not think of anything at first, whether you think about problems, tasks of the day, slopes or anything else.
Regardless, just ask the same question again with a small change:
What are the three things I could be grateful for now?
Think of three things, each: small, big, reliable, personal, material, spiritual, whatever.
Maybe you do not feel deep gratitude in your heart, maybe it’s just to accomplish (and that’s probably true at first), do the same thing.
Give time, rest, rest, do not wait a lot, do not wait for immediate results … wake up tomorrow (and every day for the rest of your life) and make the first question of the day.
Over the days, weeks, months, your heart will open to the wonderful power of the spirit, gratitude, and joy.
Then you will not only achieve your greatest goals in life but also have the opportunity.
That’s what I want for you:
You learn to be happy, to be really happy. And the key is to be grateful and very grateful.
Therefore, to do this, I would like to invite you to write in the comments here:
Three things for which you are so thankful today.
And tomorrow, when you wake up, ask yourself the “First Question of the Day” and continue this process with thanksgiving, make progress in all areas of your life and have the ability to recognize it.